Just took a diazepam for a test at the hospital. Feeling all wooooooo and vague and ‘not all there’…

I don’t like this feeling. It feels like when I was forced to take antidepressants. I hated that. I was depressed and I didn’t want some frickin’ chemical  taking the driving seat. I felt like I had been locked in a cage inside myself and I had no control of my emotions on the outside. Like I would be smiling and acting happy, but inside I was crushingly low. I just wanted to be allowed to experience my own emotions, not have them hijacked and manipulated. They didn’t go away, they got masked.

I’m so glad I only have to take this one pill.