Recovery challenge Day 15: Something I achieved today

Reduced my internet time-wasting.

Went to see a dietitian. *GULP* Very nervous, not to mention, it was a man, and I find men more intimidating to talk to about this stuff. Also my mum came in with me - MAJOR panic-inducing.

It went OK. I was hoping for a magic pill, but it’s gonna take time. However, he didn’t try to focus on my ED, which isn’t why I went, but he focused on the physical problems I have (while still being sensitive to my ED), so on the whole it was a real success. I handled it really well. I was super anxious, but I spoke calmly, listened, asked all my questions and had an intelligent and sensible discussion.

Most of all, I was really proud that i didn’t panic. He suggested starting with small changes. in the past I’d have said, no, lets go full out right away and eliminate every possible culprit food. But I know that’s just a BAD idea with my history, so I agreed to take it slow. I feel really proud of that.

I also feel proud that I let my mum come in. My ED didn’t want her there AT ALL. But my sensible head knew that having her there would be a safeguard against my ED creeping in, and it was.

I am manic right now trying to come down from the anxiety high, but i did it, and that’s the main thing.