I panicked…

I cannot believe what I just did.

I always panic and do something and I know I’m gonna regret it. But if I don’t do it, I get more and more anxious. If I hadn’t done it, I was gonna throw up and it only gets worse.

I hate this. i hate being this person.

Positive spin:

I am doing my best. If this is the best way I can relieve my anxiety, then so be it. At least let me trust myself this much. It may not be the ideal way of dealing, but at least I am trying. The more of a break I give myself over this, the faster I will get to where I want to be.

I won’t change unless i can accept how I am right now.

I did my best. That’s all you can expect of ANYone.

Why is this so hard for me to swallow though??